May 02
Here I am writing a blog about my experience in Downtown Hollywood, California on May 1st 2013. I noticed that I was enjoying myself — from the perspective of how, when and as I arrived in Downtown Hollywood, there was this feeling that came up from within myself that out-flowed into a smile. So there was no specific …
Apr 27
Here I am writing a blog about protecting my desires through trying to justify my relationship to the information that I share to others that I believe is ‘right’. And so with me trying to validate that I am ‘right’ within whatever information that I share, within this, I am protecting my own desires within me. As this point …
Apr 23
Here I am writing a blog about my experience with touch. When and as a female is touching me, based on the type of relationship that I have with her, I would go into either a reaction of a positive, or a negative energy-experience within me of feeling like a ‘man’ that is experiencing the female as a ‘female’ based …
Apr 19
Here I am doing self-forgiveness – for accepting and allowing myself to participate in procrastination without directing myself out of procrastination, but instead wait for the ‘experience’ of procrastination to arise within myself, and become motivated by this ‘experience’ of procrastination — rather than directing myself in every breath to the point that I am not dependent on a particular ‘experience’ to …
Apr 18
Here I am writing a blog about April 18th — as the day that I was originally born. When I have a look at my birthday, I ask myself the question, “Why is it that I liked to celebrate my birthdays during my younger years — from the perspective of creating ‘expectations’ for birthday gifts, and desiring to …
Apr 12
Today I had fried fish with some shrimp, french fries, and hush-puppies. I had a thought that my body wanted to eat this, and so I went to buy it. So basically, I was trying to ‘match’ what I thought that my body wanted to eat. Later on, I had a heavy feeling in my …
Mar 11
I see, realize, and understand that I formed / created a ‘relationship’ to each word that I ‘speak’. Therefore, each word that I speak has a charge it. If you have a listen to Kryon: My Existential History Part 9, you will see, realize, and understand that emotions and feelings are made out of frequency, magnetics …
Mar 09
I see, realize, and understand that I formed / created a ‘relationship’ to each word that I ‘speak’. Therefore, each word that I speak has a charge it. If you have a listen to Kryon: My Existential History Part 9, you will see, realize, and understand that emotions and feelings are made out of frequency, magnetics …
Mar 05
On March 5th 2013, I was looking at the dynamics of energy-experience, and how, when and as I have a reaction that is coming up from within myself — it would be me validating a particular energy-experience (an experience of an emotion or feeling) within me — in separation….. meaning that I create a ‘relationship’ …
Feb 11
This entry is part 1 of 5 in the series That Sugary FeelingHere I am writing a blog about my experience with eating chocolate-chip cookies. Basically, I’ve been feeling guilty eating chocolate-chip cookies. There has been a lot of talk about sugar, and how bad it is for the physical body. My first prominent introduction …
Jan 30
Here, I am writing a blog about about communicating, and simply — when and as I do things in general, how I miss myself in plain view because I see, realize, and understand that it is the small things that count, and thus, every physical movement is a ‘counting process’ wherein if I am not …
Jan 21
Here I am doing a blog because I see, realize, and understand how I move with the mind as the mind – as in participating in the mind rather than directing me in every moment of breath. And these moments wherein I am participating in the mind, I am aware of, but do not ‘move’ myself to direct myself equal-to and …
Dec 09
Here I am doing self-forgiveness about my relationship with cooked food compared to raw food. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I know what my body wants — instead of realizing that if I am not able to assess my physical body’s condition — from the perspective of being able to feel each and every part, …
Dec 02
This entry is part 18 of 18 in the series Fear of Being a Man Thus, within this initial experience of seeing this man physically abuse this female as a point to try to get her to agree to his ‘proposal’, in addition to observing females’ eye-movements, and judging their eye-movements to/towards me as a …
Nov 27
Here I am doing self-forgiveness for perceiving a cookie sweetened with sugar is ‘less than’ a cookie sweetened with agave. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that a cookie sweetened with sugar is ‘less than’ a cookie sweetened with agave because of my knowledge-and-information awareness of what sugar does to the physical body. Within this, I …
Nov 26
In this blog, I will do self-forgiveness for creating a character / personality of self-direction rather than being self-directive ‘here’. I was at the store, and I was thinking about how the mind awareness is limited to a ‘consciousness’ awareness — that if who we are, as the mind, only exist in 1 percent awareness of / as ourselves, that means that …
Nov 19
Here in this blog, I am doing self-forgiveness for the experience of feeling good. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust the ‘feelings’ that I feel regardless of whether they ‘feel good’ or not because I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that if ‘bad’ or ‘good’ feelings come up spontaneously …
Nov 18
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that intelligent people have figure-8 shapes based on the premise of ‘discipline’ — as I see a female with a figure-8 shape as disciplining herself to get to that particular shape. Thus, within this, I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to ask …
Nov 08
Here I am doing self-commitments for seeing massage / massaging as something that I see as ‘less than’ / ‘inferior’ to / as who I am. I see, realize, and understand that I connected the physical act of massaging to and as particular-specific relationships within my mind of and as being submissive to a female’s emotional and feeling volatility that I defined as ‘weak’ because …
Oct 19
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify who I am in / as ‘reactions’ within communication — using communication to convey knowledgeand information externally, but not seeing, realizing, and understanding that what is actually being communicated is not the knowledge and information point, but the reactions within the communication that …
Oct 13
Day 182 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support a system — as the fashion industry — which is not even a consistent system in and of itself because of the point that the fashion industry supports two opposing gender identity systems that exist in this world — as those …
Oct 01
Link: https://www.mindmeister.com/209989504/i-love-my-mom I love my mom. What is the fear behind loving my mom? Fear of losing my mom. What will happen if I lose my mom? 3) Part of my past will be gone forever. What parts of my past will be gone? 2) The value of my childhood years growing up What are …
Sep 30
Link: https://www.mindmeister.com/209989504/i-love-my-mom I love my mom. What is the fear behind loving my mom? Fear of losing my mom. What will happen if I lose my mom? 3) Part of my past will be gone forever. What parts of my past will be gone? 2) The value of my childhood years growing up What are the …
Sep 28
I see, realize, and understand that me having to ‘find out’ how my brothers will survive in this world / reality means that there is no direction that is being implemented sufficiently, and effectively in order for my brothers to survive effectively in this world. Thus, it is for me to take self-responsibility to teach …
Sep 16
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use a long day at work to be a justification of why I don’t have to take self-responsibility within the rest of my day — to believe that since I had a long day at work — that I can simply relax, and remain …
Sep 14
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to — throughout the day, make my breathing ‘more-than’ my thoughts — meaning that instead of simply breathing — existing ‘here’ in and as the moment, I convoluted the moment into and as submission of the mind, and thus, whatever my mind thinks…. feels…. is …
Sep 13
On September 13th, I decided to watch the movie “The Vow” about a lady that loses her memory, and thus, do not remember her husband / present life, but remembers her past more clearly before the phase of meeting her husband. When and as watching this movie, there were energetics within me that I have …
Sep 10
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to — after listening to: “Life Review – A Doomsday Activist” — leave the car to proceed to work but not realize, until I walked down the stairs, that I had an extra coat in my arms — which was the coat that I was …
Sep 05
This entry is part 14 of 18 in the series Fear of Being a Man And the way I did this initially was by going to the thrift store to buy some clothes that were designed for the opposite sex. I initially bought two velvet attires, as velvet reminded me of ‘water’ which I connected …
Sep 03
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to — when and as going about my day — miss a significant point which is me in and as who I am within what I do, but instead of being equal to and one with and as me ‘here’ within and as what …
Aug 31
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to — when and as going on Facebook, to be ‘possessed’ by the feelings that come forth within me as an ‘out-flow’ within the moment — because when and as I look at Facebook, and my eyes get slightly bigger, for instance, and/or my mouth …
Aug 10
I commit myself to see, realize, and understand that I do not have any ‘real’ friends if I am not self-directive in how I approach the people that I call my friends. I commit myself to use self-honesty to debunk the friendship-integrity as how my ‘friendships’ are in-fact structured as — because if I allow …
Aug 07
I commit myself to see, realize, and understand that any relationship that is not expressed in self-honesty is a lie. Therefore, I commit myself to establish all of my relationships in and as self-honesty through and as being clear, and direct rather than evasive in and as my approach when speaking with someone. And if …
Aug 06
I commit myself to see, realize, and understand that being ‘caught by surprise’ when someone asked me for some assistance is a mind-reaction showing me that I am not equal to and one with and as another in making the decision to help them out. Therefore, I am not really helping another in self-honesty, but …
Jul 30
I commit myself to see, realize, and understand that the beginning of life doesn’t come after graduation, but that no one is in-fact directing their life / living in and as this world if money is the dictator of everything that we do. When and as I support the belief that there is a particular-specific …
Jul 29
I commit myself to see, realize, and understand that I separated myself from others to the point that their amplitude-frequency of their sound became influential, as I judged their particular-specific sound-representations within and as a positive-energy experience or a negative-energy experience. Thus, when and as I see myself accepting and allowing sounds from and of …
Jul 27
I commit myself to be clear in my standing on the things that I should do throughout the day by having a look at all of the things that I have to do throughout the day, and write down the primary activities on a piece of paper or a whiteboard, but to not overdo the …
Jul 04
Within cross-dressing, I was always the receiver because it wasn’t something that I directively decided to do. I decided to cross-dress based on ‘experiences’ that aligned to and as ‘consequences’ that played out as cross-dressing. In my younger years, I had heterogeneous thoughts about cross-dressing, but it was never something as per me wanting to …
Jun 29
Note: Read Earth’s Journey to Life blogs about Redefining Words for a better understanding…. Gathering information: Allocation Point of Self within the Word ‘Desire’ The word ‘desire’ has been allocated within me according to how I have defined myself within the word ‘desire’. I was the receiver of desire as I always played the submissive role wherein I …
Jun 21
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within desire for relationships as the principle of having no emotional strings attached when the basis of the relationship in itself is still based on self-interest of and as fueling all other desires that does not directly conform to objective emotions and feelings, …
Jun 20
Please also read Bernard Poolman’s blog on Relationship Dynamics…. Most of my desire for relationships revolved around having a relationship that is no-strings attached — meaning that there are no emotional strings attached to the relationship because I questioned, in my life, the point of relationships because how could one really be in a relationship …
Jun 18
Note: Read Earth’s Journey to Life blogs about Redefining Words for a better understanding…. Gathering information: Allocation Point of Self within the Word ‘Pig’ The word ‘pig’ has been allocated within me according to how I have defined myself within the word ‘pig’. I always saw pigs as beautiful little creatures as they grace the …
Jun 16
Here, I am doing self-forgiveness for the experience of buying a package of pork tenderloins at the store, and thus, existing within a fear-experience based on its form, shape, and color, and the connections that I formed with it of which I gave it a ‘life’ within my mind, and feared that it would bite …
Jun 05
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare my childhood life personality to my adulthood life personality as a point of separation, and thus, see my childhood as ‘more-than’ because I defined myself as innocent during that time. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that …
Apr 23
Today, I was at the store, and I noticed that my movements and inner conversations were that of anger towards females — especially Caucasian women. Because of the form, shape, and color of women, I judged myself as ‘less than’ because I judged females with figure-8 forms as ‘more than’ — of any female for …
